Yikes! Glad it wasn't something fragile!

I received this package at my mailbox the other day.  It looked like it had been dropped out of a truck in the rain and run over a couple of times.  Fortunately, the book contained in the package was relatively unharmed.

But you’ll be pleased to know that this isn’t a rant against the fact that the US Postal Service mangled my package; I actually used to be a mail carrier, and I know these things happen from time to time.  No big deal.

What bothered me, though, was the wrapping that the package in question arrived in.  It had what I can only assume is the USPS version of an apology printed on it.  Here, have a look:

Oh, I see...the mangled package was MY fault!

If you want to read the full text of the “apology”, click on the picture and you’ll get to see an enlarged version…then come back here for the rest of the story.

Did you catch that?  The “apology” starts off nicely enough, then immediately shifts into explaining why, in reality, it wasn’t really their fault.  After all, they reason, they handle an awful lot of mail.  They even managed to make me feel a little guilty about irresponsible packaging and the damage my offending package might have caused to their machinery and other pieces of mail.  Then I remembered: I had nothing to do with the packaging.  I was the recipient, an innocent victim of mail mutilation.

It isn’t just the Postal Service that tries this kind of maneuvering to avoid responsibility for their actions, though.  Think of all the times you’ve had a company rep or a customer service agent make you feel responsible for the poor service that they were delivering.

So here’s the question: are you doing the same thing to your clients?  Stop and think about that for a minute.  Have you ever, in an effort to avoid responsibility for a problem, spun it around so the customer was the bad guy?  It’s tempting, isn’t it?

There’s a problem with that kind of thinking, though: the customer knows it’s not his/her fault, and will resent you making that implication.  Think of the damage that causes to your relationships with your customers.  Instead, why not just offer a sincere apology and fix the problem?

Or don’t.  It’s up to you.  Just know that blaming your customers for problems with your service will eventually lead to a different kind of problem: no customers.  That is, unless you’re the US Postal Service…

OK: let me start by saying that my decision to wait until Wednesday morning (the morning I left for CES 2011 in Las Vegas) to book my hotel room for CES was probably, in hindsight, a huge mistake.

Rooms on the Strip that would normally go for $60-$70 a night were suddenly in the $300-$400 range.  Unreal.  So I ended up staying at the Siena Suites in Henderson.  It was a nice enough place, kind of an extended stay type of hotel with a kitchen, living room and bedroom.  It was clean, quiet, and the bed was reasonably comfortable; everything I look for in a hotel.

Except for the toilet paper.  I’m not sure what S & M torture shop the management bought it in, but I’d have to guess that it was one that leaned a little more heavily toward the S.  Stiff and rough, while great qualities in a scotch on the rocks, are not what you want in toilet paper.  At least, they’re not what I want.

A quick review of the prices on ToiletPaperWorld.com (no, I didn’t make that up…click the link if you don’t believe me) shows that prices range from about $.50 per roll on the low end to a high of about $1.25 for the premium grade stuff.

During my 4-day stay, I used less than a roll, but let’s say I was a heavy user and managed, somehow, to use a whole roll.  The difference in price between the low-grade stuff they supplied and the premium quality I’m used to would have averaged out to around $0.19 per day.

Here’s my question: was it worth the $0.19 to the hotel to guarantee that, while I was willing to put up with it this time, I’d never come back to their hotel again?  Sure, I could have gone to the corner market and bought my own toilet paper; as it turned out, I could never remember until it was too late.  So I had to grin and bear it.

And there’s the lesson: while cutting costs certainly has a place in your business, cutting corners doesn’t.  It’s one of the most effective ways to disappoint your customers, and those you disappoint are usually only to happy to tell all their friends (or readers) about the experience.  Is that what you really want?

So before you decide that saving $0.19 on supplies is a good idea, ask yourself: is this one of those corners that, if I cut it, could cost me a customer?  If it is, spend the extra money and watch the your customers keep coming back for more.

And if you ever find yourself staying at the Siena Suites in Henderson, be sure to BYOTP.

Delivering outstanding customer service is simple: just give your customers everything they expect and then some.

If you think your customers’ expectations are too high or if you’re just not willing to make the commitment to do whatever it takes to make them happy, please don’t whine when they choose to do business with someone who will.

In an economic climate where consumers are watching their spending more closely than ever before, the one who provides the most valuable service wins.  And here’s the thing: you don’t get to decide whose service is best.  The customer does, and they cast their votes with dollars.

There is a question everyone in business for themselves should consider: “How do I treat my Super Patrons?”

What is a Super Patron? The “Super Patron” is the model customer, someone who not only values your product or service; they don’t only religiously visit your blog, website, store or place of business. The Super Patron sees the true value in what you have to offer and appreciates it so much that they promote you and your business to their family and friends. They go to serious trouble to be sure that the people around them at least try your goods or services for themselves.

Unfortunately, because the Super Patron is so rare, they can sometimes be lost in the shuffle, being seen as simply a “good customer”. There is an easy way to tell a good customer from a Super Patron. A good customer comes to you when they need something. Once their needs are satisfied, “thank yous” are exchanged and until next time, communication is severed.

A Super Patron does more. They introduce you to those close to them and most likely, show their gratitude in some way: they give you referrals. They pass on information that could be of value to you and your business. Even small thank you gifts or cards, while rare, are not unheard of.

Of course, in business, there are plenty of fakes, people looking to butter you up in exchange for a discount or a freebie. After all, sincerity is easy enough to fake . . . for a while, but time separates truth from fiction. A true Super Patron has been a loyal customer for quite some time, most likely years.

And how do you reward years of loyal patronage? Truth be told, a Super Patron deserves a measure of extra time and attention. They have proven themselves to you and it is only fair to show them that they truly do matter. Your business would not thrive were it not for their support. So, give their orders priority. Take their calls personally instead of leaving it to an assistant. Make no mistake, these little things are noticed.

Is there a Super Patron that stands out in your mind? Someone that has really gone the extra mile for you and your business? Do more than offer a slight discount on their next order. While this is appreciated, it is still somewhat self-serving. No, do something unexpected. Surprise them. You would be surprised to see how far a bottle of their favorite wine or a gift card to their favorite restaurant can go. And while it is your goal to simply show them that you appreciate their business, they will not be able to resist telling their friends what you did for them. This promotion is not your reward. It is simply a byproduct of good business.

Ryan Snethen is the brains behind the blog at DidYouMissIt.com, a blog dedicated to providing quality reviews of movie gems you may have missed.  Let him know what you think about the “Super Patron” concept in the comments below, and be sure to check out his blog for some great movie suggestions.

A lot of people responded to a post I wrote last week about marketing like a douchebag.  The post was written in response to an e-mail I received from someone who wanted me to come to a “herd building day” at an upcoming seminar he’s hosting.

While much of the feedback I received was in the form of objections to the use of the “d-word”, there were a couple of questions that jumped out at me that I wanted to take a few minutes to address.  WARNING: the aforementioned “d-word” might pop up a couple of times in this post, so I’ll get that one out of the way first.

Question: Why did you describe the offending info-marketer as a “douchebag”? Answer: First of all, it has nothing to do with the fact that he’s an information marketer.  I have no problem with information marketers, especially since I consider myself to be one…or at least I’m testing the waters.  What I object to, and what inspired the name-calling, is bad information marketing practices.  More on that later.  The reason I used the word “douchebag” is that’s the only one I could think of that captured the visceral reaction I’d had to the email I’d received.  I spent a good two minutes trying to find another word that captured the feeling.  I couldn’t.  Moving on.

Question: What is a “herd building day”?  Answer: I have no idea.  I tried to figure it out, but the page that the email linked to had very little information about what the event actually entails.  Maybe you can figure it out.  I’m not going to dignify the page with a link; just google “herd building day” (with the quotes); it’ll be the link right under the post from this blog.

I’m going to make an assumption, though: based on previous communication from this particular marketer, I would guess that a “herd building day” is designed to teach you how to create a group of people who will buy stuff from you, regardless of whether it has any real value to them, because you’ll know the magic formula for crafting your “marketing message”.  Seriously.  This is the kind of stuff this guy teaches.  Of course, it could also be an inside joke referring to the fact that the people who sign up for the class are demonstrating the very herd behavior they’re hoping to learn how to create in others.  Pretty sick, eh?

Question: Why do you object to the use of the word “herd”?  Isn’t that just another way of saying “tribe”?  Answer: Only if you’re a douchebag.  I object to the idea of referring to your clients as a “herd” because a “herd” is a group of mindless animals, doing whatever they’re told to do, following wherever the leader goes.  A tribe, on the other hand, is a group of folks who share a common vision and are working together to achieve it.  There may be a leader, but if his head gets too big or he starts to milk the tribe for everything it’s worth, the tribe can kick the leader out or defect to a new tribe.  Herds don’t do that, because herds don’t think; they blindly follow.

Question: How can I be an effective marketer without being a douchebag?  Don’t I have to know how to manipulate people to make them buy?  Answer: It’s pretty simple, really: start by respecting your clients.  If you do, you’ll be more likely to create and market products that they want to buy, and you won’t have to manipulate them.  The basis of bad marketing is that it assumes that, no matter what the product is or whether or not it has any real value, people will buy it if you have a great “marketing message”.

Forget that.  No matter what these guys tell you, it’s total BS.  Do you really want to sell people stuff that’s going to be useless to them or, worse, is going to piss them off when they realize that you have their money and all they have to show for it is a bunch of crap?  If not, take the time to ask around and find out what kind of products your ideal customers want to buy.  Of course, that assumes you know who your ideal customers are.  If you don’t, start here.

If you start from a place of humility and are willing to ask how you can best serve your clients, you’re likelihood of success is greatly increased.  Figure out how to create a product that will change the lives of your clients in a positive way, and they’ll beat a path to your door to buy it.

This started out as a reply to a comment left by my buddy Jim Kennan on yesterday’s post about rising up against bad customer service, but somehow it turned into another post. I want to thank Jim for chiming in and for bringing the other side of the discussion up. Here, in part, is what Jim had to say:

“Jerry, I’m behind you on poor customer service. BUT- I don’t believe the customer is always right. I don’t believe we need to just fall to our knees to the customer is KING, my lord and master.

There are customers I don’t want. Customers are not all the same. They don’t all have the same value. They are not all worth the same.

Every customer deserves to be treated with respect. NO QUESTION about that. But, we don’t owe customers anything more than respect.

Smart companies will use customer service as a differentiator, but they need to be smart about it…

Customers are not as loyal as you suggest.

My point, there is ABSOLUTELY a diminishing return to customer service.

As you’ve described here, appears to be well into the diminished returns.”

Jim makes a couple of excellent points. First, I totally support the right of a business to decide that they don’t want me as a customer. If that’s the case, I’d just ask that they implement clause #6 of the open letter and be honest about it. Tell me outright that you don’t want my business and I’ll gladly take it elsewhere; just don’t pretend like you care and are trying to be helpful when you don’t and you aren’t. I’m a big boy; you’re not going to hurt my feelings if you tell me you want me to go buy my widgets somewhere else.

I had a sales mentor once who always told me that if I didn’t fire my worst customer once a month, I’d be stuck with bad customers forever. It’s advice that’s served me well, and as a result of that policy I’m able to maintain a level of customer service that outshines anything my competition can offer. Why? Because I like the people I do business with and they like me.

Second, I understand completely that not all customers are as loyal as they should be; I wonder, though, how much of that can be blamed on the fact that businesses, for the most part, give them very little reason to be loyal. The fact is that many customers are incredibly loyal, and it usually has everything to do with customer service.

Take my relationship with Verizon Wireless as an example. I’ve been a Verizon customer for a number of years, and I’m a real fan of their customer service. In my experience, their phone reps are a delight to deal with and always make sure that any issues are resolved before they let me get off the phone. As a result, I recently tolerated a 3 year stretch of having no cell phone signal at my house because Verizon’s coverage was spotty in the county I was living in. All of my friends had AT&T and could make calls from my house. I could easily have switched to AT&T, but I chose to stay with Verizon because I love the people who work there.

What this post and the “open letter” campaign are really about is a determination to end the the tolerance of bad service. We as customers have become so accustomed to bad service that we just pretend like it’s something we have to get used to. But we don’t. We get to choose. Just like the business has a choice in whether or not they want us as customers, we have a choice and we need to exercise it more often.

So I’m encouraging people to make a clear statement of their intention to receive nothing lest than the best service available. I totally get that there are bad customers that no one should have to deal with, but I’m not one of them and neither are the majority of the people they deal with. In fact, we’re delightful as long as we feel like we’re being respected. Even when I don’t get my way, as long as the message is delivered in such a way that I believe the person gives a damn, I’m OK with it. What makes my head explode is when I here things like “There’s nothing I can doooooo!” delivered in that whiny voice that makes my skin crawl. Ugh!

The bottom line is that I care about my customers, and I choose them carefully. If you’re my customer, I AM going to treat you like King. Even when I have to tell you no, I’m going to figure out a way to do it that makes us both happy with the outcome. I expect the same from the businesses that want me to be their customer, and I won’t accept anything less. Yes, delivering great customer service is hard work and it’s expensive; and, if you take the time to attract the right kind of customers, it’ll be worth it.

Thanks again Jim!

I’m increasingly disturbed…OK, appalled would be a better word…by an attitude I’m seeing crop up more and more frequently. As you know from reading this blog, I’m kind of a fanatic about customer service. As a result, when I encounter what I percieve to be bad customer service, I’m vocal about it.

What concerns me is the growing number of people who react negatively when I point out bad customer service. Many of them say things that basically amount to “that’s what the stupid customers get for being so stupid and stupidly calling with their stupid complaints!”

More and more, people in general (and customer service reps in particular) are defending the right of businesses to provide bad service. The icing on the cake was an article I came across via Dan Waldschmidt’s blog about Dell charging a monthly fee for customer service. Have a look at the article here, and pay special attention to the first dozen or so comments. You’ll read things like this:

“I whole-heartedly agree that most calls to tech support should be charged a service fee. Especially if the caller is someone whom is too stupid to actually read the instruction book or has absolutely no common sense. I mean, we are here on the phone trying to help them fix a problem that is usually created by the customer in the first place. Should we really have to waste our time fixing your mistakes for minimum wage with you complaining in our ear and saying how crappy support is while we can still hear you?”

When I read that the first time, I saw red. I started shouting at my computer at the top of my voice. My wife even took note of it, saying that I sounded like I had a lot of anger about something. She was right, and part of my frustration is that more people aren’t righteously indignant over the situation.

In one way, we’re getting exactly what we deserve. For far too long, we’ve been tolerating the decline of customer service, and that’s led to a generation of people who think that all the fuss over expecting good customer service is just an “old people thing”. It’s a problem that I refuse to contribute to; I don’t, under any circumstances, tolerate bad service. I’m going to continue to raise a fuss, and I hope you’ll join me.

In that spirit, I’ve composed the following Open Letter to Crappy Customer Service Reps and the Companies Who Employ Them. Feel free to copy it and insert the names of the offending parties, then send it to the person in the company who can do something about it! As tempting as it is, there’s absolutely no sense in getting into a debate with the person providing the poor service; if they cared at all, they would be giving you good service. Talk to the boss, and talk with your dollars. It might cost a little more or be inconvenient, but are you really enjoying the less expensive/more convenient alternative? I didn’t think so.

Here’s the letter:

“Dear _______________,

I think it’s time we had a little “come to Jesus” meeting about the level of service you provide to me, your Lord and Master. Yes, you read that right: I am your King. In case you’ve forgotten our arrangement, let me remind you: I’m the customer, which makes me the Boss. As such, I expect the following from you in all future interactions:

1. Your respect. In return, I promise to treat you with respect…but you have to go first. When I approach you with a complaint, I don’t want to hear sighs of frustration. I don’t want to see your eyes rolling back. I don’t want to be addressed in a tone that clearly conveys (whether you’re aware of it or not) that you think I’m an idiot. Even if you think that I’m to blame for the problem I’m having, I want you to take ownership of the problem and FIX IT!
2. Your gratitude. Yes, that’s right: I want you to say “Thank you,” and I want you to mean it. After all, if it weren’t for me you wouldn’t have a job! Think about that the next time you take my order or deliver my product or hand me my change. Make eye contact, smile, and say a hearty “Thanks!” We’ll both feel better about the interaction, and I might even mention it to a few of my friends.
3. Your smile. Even if you’re having a bad day, fake it for me. Like it or not, your attitude is written all over your face, and part of my selection criteria for the people I choose to do business with is friendliness. You can convey that friendliness with your facial expression…or not. It’s your choice, and it’s mine to come back to your business…or not.
4. Your deference. I know it’s fallen out of fashion of late, but there used to be a very popular phrase that said “The customer is always right.” Let’s get back to that arrangement, shall we? I’d really appreciate it. And if I’m really not right, let’s just pretend that I am and figure out a way to make me happy, OK? Thanks.
5. Your professionalism. If you make a promise to have something fixed for me by a certain date, make a habit out of keeping that promise. I understand that things can sometimes come up that keep you from fulfilling your commitment to me, but that’s really not my problem. Do your best to get it done anyway.
6. Your honesty. If you quote me a price, stick by it unless I change something. And make sure that the price you quote includes providing me with great customer service after the sale. Don’t give me a low price to get me to buy your stuff, then try to charge me more when something goes wrong. If I have a problem, I want to be able to call you without getting my credit card out of my wallet. That’s part of our deal.
7. Your enthusiasm. When I come in the door of your business, please look up from what you’re doing and acknowledge my presence. I’m there to spend money on something I want or need, not to be ignored. If I want to be ignored, I’ll go to the DMV. Acknowledge me, look happy to see me, greet me like I’m the one writing your pay check…because I am!

If you’ll agree to these rules of engagement, I will continue to frequent your establishment and trade my dollars for your product or service. Should you decide to ignore this request, however, I’ll have no choice but to take my dollars elsewhere to get the products and service I need.

Oh, you didn’t know I could do that? You weren’t aware that at least ten other establishments in our neighborhood do exactly what you do? And that at least one or two of them would be happy to comply with my list of demands? That’s too bad; you really should get out more. No worries though: you’ll have plenty of time to go check them out when all your customers are gone.

Sincerely,

Your (Former?) Customer”

Let’s declare the rest of April “Customer Appreciation Month” and, rather than think of this as a battle against bad customer service, let’s make it a movement for good customer service. Use the letter above (or something similar) to state your intention to receive excellent customer service at the establishments you frequent from this point forward, forever. Put the businesses you buy from on notice that you aren’t going to tolerate bad customer service any longer. Vote with your dollars. Be willing to sacrifice a little convenience to make your point. Because if we don’t do it now, we’ll continue to get exactly what we’re asking for.

Are you with me? Prove it by leaving a comment below and forwarding this post to your friends, family and coworkers. On my own, I can make a ripple; together, we can start a revolution!

I wanted to talk a little more about the topic of customer engagement.  I’ve been giving this a lot of thought, in light of the changes that business is facing.  Social media, web 2.0 and a shrinking world are putting tremendous pressure on businesses to adapt to the new expectations of their clients.

Traditional companies, especially those who are looking for their customers among Generations X and Y, have a new challenge to rise to.  That challenge can be summed up in one question: Is it fun to do business with you?

There’s no denying it.  Baby Boomers have for years decried the fact that “kids these days” need to be constantly entertained.  And they’re right, of course.  Just look at phones: modern phones are not made for placing calls, they’re made for entertaining.  So if you’re selling a product or service to this group who need to be entertained, what are you doing to entertain them? Again, are you making doing business with you fun?  If you’re not, there’s a pretty good chance you’re not going to survive.

Tomorrow’s customer isn’t going to base their buying decisions primarily on things like features and benefits or price.  Their expectation is that every company will offer great features, benefits and prices.  After all, this is a generation of buyers who knows how to research, and if you’re not in line with the market, you don’t stand a chance.  No, tomorrow’s net-savvy consumer is going to decide whether or not to buy from you based on the entertainment value you provide.

A lot of traditional businesses are having a hard time figuring this out, as evidenced by the way they are using social media and the web.  They put up static web pages and use social media as a mode of free advertising to promote their own agenda.  Folks, that just doesn’t work any more (if it ever really did).  Have a look around: look at the Zappos’ and Chipotles and 37Signals of the world and you see companies who not only are excellent at what they do, but that are fun to do business with.  They get it, and they are thinking, not of their own agendas, but the agendas of the ones who really count: the customers.

So have a look at your own business and ask yourself: am I (or is my company) fun to do business with?  Is there entertainment value in my/our offering?  If not, how can I add it in and be more fun?  Beacuse even if you’re not targeting Gen’s X & Y now, it won’t be long before you will be.

Oh, and their younger siblings and kids?  Let’s just leave it at this: you ain’t seen nothin’ yet!

The old rules of business were pretty simple.  In fact, William Dillard once summed them up in three words: Location, location, location.  The idea was that any business could be successful, so long as it was located on the right street corner in the right part of town.  Well, things aren’t that simple any more.

With the rise of the internet and e-commerce, the physical location of your business is less important than it was in the past, especially when your business is service-related or when you sell intangibles or products (like software or web design) that can be delivered online.  Even traditional brick-and-mortar businesses are feeling the effects of this revolution, many of them adding an online store to augment their retail sales and shipping their products around the world.

If location is no longer of primary concern, what, then, are the new rules of business?  I call them the three Cs: content, connection and conversation.

Let’s start by saying that if your business hasn’t joined the online community and started participating in social media, you’re missing the boat in a big way.  It’s time to get on the bus.  That said, you need to pay attention to how you are conducting business online.

Do you see social media marketing as a form of free advertising?  Think again.  If you join the party with that outlook, you’re dead before you begin.  This is where the three Cs kick in, starting with your first step: content.

If you’re going to participate online, start by paying attention to the content you’re providing to your prospects and customers.  And by content, I mean everything you provide to your customers: your websites, your social media profiles, videos, e-brochures and anything else your customers see need to communicate that you are an authority on your subject.  That goes without saying.  But they also need to demonstrate a high level of interest in your customers: what they find interesting and entertaining.  You also need to clearly communicate that you care, not just about their wallets, but about them.  Today’s consumer wants to see that you have a vested interest in them.  Once they do, they’ll be ready for new rule #2: connection.

Once you’ve grabbed the interest of your prospect by providing great content, you need to make it easy for them to establish some kind of connection with you.  Whether it’s a Facebook fan page, a Ning community, an active Twitter stream or a forum on your own website, give your customers somewhere to hang out and chat with other customers.  This is how you start to build a community for your brand; it’s also one way you can really set yourself apart from all the other companies who do exactly what you do for the same price (otherwise known as your competition).  Providing a place for your customers to connect with one another and with you will naturally lead to rule #3: conversation.

Take a quick minute to compare the way Chipotle uses it Facebook fan page to the way General Motors does (or doesn’t).  On Chipotle’s page, you see steady interaction from the folks at Chipotle.  They interact with their customers who take the time to stop by and leave a comment.  They banter, they joke, they fool around, and their customers LOVE them for it.

Now look at GM’s fan page: at the time this post was written, I had to scroll all the way back to December 10th to see a dry, boring reminder about some webinar they were conducting, reminding people to dial in and listen.  Nowhere on the page do you see them engaging with their customers, whether fans or detractors.  As a result, you see a lot of comments on the page making note of the fact that GM is essentially non-responsive to customer concerns.

You’ll notice another difference, as well: General Motors, one of the best-know brands in the world has around 106,000 fans on Facebook while Chipotle, a relatively small chain of burrito restaurants in North America, has almost 530,000.  That’s the difference that conversation makes.

So if you want to make 2010 a banner year for your business, make sure you’re paying attention to the new rules, the three Cs for success in business in our modern era: provide the best content you can to demonstrate that you have your customer in mind, provide them a place to make a connection with you and other customers and, one you’ve got them there, engage them in a conversation to show your level of commitment to their satisfaction.

Those are the new rules of business.  Are you up to the challenge?