“That’s what a writer does. A writer’s job is to tell the truth.” – Andy Rooney

I was reading an article about Andy Rooney’s death earlier this week, and I came across that quote.  Rooney, best known for his curmudgeonly opinion pieces at the end of episodes of “60 Minutes“, is one of my heroes.  Granted, I haven’t worked my way through all 1,097 of his show-enders, but what I’ve seen consistently is a man who wasn’t afraid to speak his mind.  He didn’t hold back.

Sometimes he offended people, sometimes he caused an uproar, but he always spoke his truth.  He didn’t form his opinions by sticking his finger to the wind or consulting focus groups; he knew where he stood.  Whether you agreed with him or not, whether you like him or not, you got the sense that he was a person of conviction.

So here’s a question to ponder while you reflect on Rooney’s passing: can people say the same about you?

Speaking your truth isn’t always easy.  It’s not always popular.  It’s not always going to make people like you.  And it’s the most important thing you’ll ever do.

Of course, in order to speak your truth, you have to know what it is.  Are you taking the time to reflect on what’s truly important in your life?  Are you seeking to find your truth?  Or have you checked out and resigned yourself to living out the plans others have made for you?

I read this on Steve Hamm‘s Facebook wall earlier tonight: “Building a life by design, not by default.”  Yeah…that’s it.  That’s what I’m talking about.  Steve is spot on: if you’re not choosing your truth, designing your life every step of the way, then you’re building a life by default.  Usually those defaults have been programmed by someone else, and the default programs are typical not going to give you the life you want.

Andy Rooney made a career out of speaking his truth; there’s absolutely no reason your truth should be any different or less meaningful.  You just have to develop the audacious habit of standing in it, living it, and choosing to do so every minute of every day.  And that, dear readers, is the secret sauce to a fulfilled life.

Just for fun, here’s my favorite Andy Rooney moment:

How about you?  Do you have a favorite Andy Rooney-ism?  If so, or even if you hated him, share it in the comments below.

You know what a BHAG is, right? It’s an acronym for Big Hairy Audacious Goal, and if you have any, you know they can be scary. In fact, BHAGs are all about setting your sights on something that really scares the piss out of you.

The first definition I could find for “audacious” was “extremely bold or daring; recklessly brave; fearless”; I like that. It conjures images of people running into burning towers to save the lives of complete strangers, and risking (or losing) their own lives in the process. It’s a noble attribute that we all aspire to but that very few of us ever have the opportunity to test; I don’t think it’s the definition I’d use to describe a goal. After all, just because the goal is big and hairy and makes your knees knock land your heart skip beats doesn’t mean you have to pursue it recklessly.

I like this definition better: “recklessly bold in defiance of convention, propriety, law, or the like; insolent; brazen.” Or even this one: “lively; unrestrained; uninhibited”. I think that captures the spirit of a BHAG: you’re doing something that flies in the face of your norm, something in defiance of the conventions and limitations of your current life situation, something that your family members or friends might consider insolent or brazen, something uninhibited; in short, something all you. BHAGs are about speaking and living your truth.

But how do you pursue a Big Hairy Audacious Goal, well, audaciously? After all, audacity isn’t a quality that’s encouraged in our society; in fact, audacious children are scolded, disciplined and medicated in an effort to get them to “just behave”. And it’s no different when they leave school and go off to work: audacity and middle management are blood enemies. So how do we learn to behave audaciously again?

It’s simple, really: do something that scares you. Don’t think about it…just do it. Start with something small and work your way up. Don’t ignore the fear you feel; don’t fight it or judge it as bad. Feel the fear, then do it anyways.

You’ll be amazed at how taking simple, small, audacious action on a regular basis (daily, if possible) will change you. Right now, go make a list of the things that scare you: put everything on it, the large and the small, the things that terrify you and the things that just make you sweat a little. Pick one of the not so scary things, and make it happen this week, today if you can (and you can…it’s just your fear that wants you to schedule it for Friday at noon).

And make your commitment to do it even stronger by leaving a comment on this post; if you commit to it in a public forum like this, the chances that you’ll actually do it will be much greater. When you’ve done it, be sure to come back and share that, too. Your story might be just the thing that will push someone out of a life of timidity and into a life of bold, daring, audacious action.

One of the realizations I’ve come to over the past few weeks of breakdowns and breakthroughs is that I have to, at all costs, stop pretending to be someone else.  You’d think that would be pretty easy; on the surface, consciously, we don’t like to think of ourselves as posers.

And yet, every day, we do and say things that are out of line with what we really want to do and say.  I’ll wager lunch at your favorite drive-thru restaurant that you did it at least once today; I know I did.  Why do we do it?  Because we’re afraid.  Afraid of what other people will think, afraid that we might be wrong, afraid that nobody will like us if we let them know who we really are.

Meanwhile, we’re slowly dying inside.  Keep turning off those aspects of your personality that you fear, one by one, and eventually you’ll wake up one day wondering who you are and what you’ve done with your life.  Trust me when I tell you that it’s not fun.  Fruitful and necessary, yes, but not fun.  Because it’s at that point that you have to start untangling yourself from the story and sorting out which bits are the real you and which bits were the version of you that was engineered to please others.

The problem for some of us is that we’ve spent so long pleasing others that we’ve completely forgotten what, exactly, it is that’s important to us.  We get so caught up in school and work and kids and activities that we never take the time to reflect on the direction we’re headed.

It’s time to get back in touch with your dreams.  Don’t let another day go by; start now.  Take some time today, even if it’s only five minutes…hell, even if it’s only one minute…to really think about what it is that you want to do with your life.  Write it down and ask yourself why you’re not doing it; what’s holding you back?

Then, when you’ve got the vision and purged the excuses, start doing it.  You owe it to yourself and, more importantly, you owe it to the world.

We’re counting on you.  It’s time to stop pretending and start being you.  It’s time to be amazing.  You can do this!

A friend reminded me the other day of the parable (variously attributed to Alexander the Great, Cortes and others) of the adventurer who, on landing on the shores of his destination, burned his ships to send a message to his men that there was no turning back.  She had recently had a “ship-burning” moment of her own and was at the same time ecstatic and nervous.

I had mine last Wednesday, and I know exactly what she’s talking about.

You see, setting the ships on fire is fun: you get to play with matches and lighter fluid, which is always a good time.  It’s only when you’re standing on the shore, watching the flames engulf every last scrap of wood, that you get the sinking, “Oh shit!” feeling in your stomach and begin to wonder if you did the right thing and whether you remembered to pay the insurance premium this month.

Don’t get me wrong; I know that burning the ships was the right thing to do.  If I hadn’t, I don’t think I’d ever have broken away from some of the things that have been holding me back.  I’m simply acknowledging the fear, owning it, staring it in its ugly face, getting ready to let it go.

A lot has changed in just a few short days, but the biggest change has been in me.  There’s an old Zen teaching that I love: “Before enlightenment, chopping wood, carrying water. After enlightenment, chopping wood, carrying water.”  I take it to mean for me that, while the things that need to be done remain the same (i.e. making a living, paying the bills, etc.), they’ll never be quite the same because I’m a different person than I was last week.

Here we go.  No more pretending; time to start showing up as me and doing what I need to do to fulfill my mission.  More on that in a future post; let it suffice to say for now that I’m more excited than I’ve ever been.

In the meantime, there’s something I want to say to you.

The reason for last week’s breakdown was simple: I’d been pretending and, as it turns out, you can only do that for so long before it catches up with you.  I know I’m not alone.  There are a lot of us pretending right now, pretending that we’re doing what we want to do and that everything is okay, while inside we’re dying a little every day.  Sound familiar?

So here’s what I want to say: it’s alright to stop pretending now.  In fact, it’s more than alright; if you want to start living, it’s a necessity.

Yes, it will be hard, and yes, it will upset the people in your life who would prefer that you keep pretending so as not to disturb their sleep.  You can’t change those things.  All you can change is you.

The good news is that once you stop pretending, life just gets better every day.  I’m only four days into my new life, and I can tell you without hesitation that I made the right choice.

Neil Senturia is not your typical…well, he’s not your typical anything, at least as far as I can tell from his new book I’m There for You, Baby – The Entrepreneur’s Guide to the Galaxy, Volume 1 (WARNING: affiliate link).  What I can tell you for certain, though, is that Mr. Senturia knows how to tell a story.

I haven’t had this much fun reading a book since I was a kid reading They Shoot Canoes, Don’t They? by Patrick McManus (yep, another affiliate link…sorry, but it’s just easier than logging out of Amazon).  I don’t often laugh out loud when I read business books, but this one had me chuckling, snickering and, occasionally, guffawing (I may have just made that word up…sorry about that).  Even better, I learned a thing or two along the way.

The book is a series of stories built around The Baby Rules, a set of entrepreneurial truisms culled from Senturia’s experiences as a real estate mogul, venture capitalist, Hollywood writer and all around deal-making addict.  But don’t make the mistake of believing everything you read; Rule #109 states “Never let the facts get in the way of a good story.”  Senturia’s grasp of the ridiculous, his razor-sharp wit, and his blunt-force-trauma style of truth-telling make for a great read.

One of my favorite lessons, and one that made me stop and think about my own journey, is Rule #19: “Entrepreneurs do not do it for the fame or fortune – they do it for revenge.”   I’ve been thinking about that one ever since I read it; it’s been dogging my steps, haunting my sleep, and generally driving me nuts for weeks.

Because I’m realizing how true it is, at least sometimes.  I find myself driven, sometimes to extreme measures, by a deep desire to prove that I can do it, no matter what anyone says.  The voices in my head, the ones that belong to former teachers and family members and well-meaning friends, telling me to settle down and settle in and settle?  I’ve got a middle finger that would like to speak with you.

And that’s the kind of festering truth that I’m There for You, Baby rips the scab off of.

Thank you, Neil Senturia, for a fantastic book.  And thank you for breaking some shit in my head that needed breaking. Consider me a fan.

When I first got my preview copy of Guy Kawasaki’s “Enchantment” (yes, I got a free copy, and yes, that’s an affiliate link), I wasn’t sure what to expect.  I don’t really know that much about Guy, and I haven’t read any of his other books (sorry Guy).  I knew he was something of a big deal on Twitter and that he was the guy (no pun intended) behind Alltop.com, but that was about it.

In other words, I started “Enchantment” with zero expectations.  I only tell you that so you’ll understand that what I’m about to say isn’t colored by my being a long-time Guy Kawasaki fanboy.

Now that we understand each other, let me just say this: whatever you’re doing, stop now for as long as it takes to jump over to Amazon and buy this book.  Yes, it’s that good.

Guy has distilled the art of getting people to support your cause down to simple, manageable steps.  Whether it’s a business, a charity, a product or an idea, enchantment is the art of rallying not just support but commitment from those you lead or those in the trenches with you.  In Guy’s own words, “if you need to enchant people, you’re doing something meaningful. If you’re doing something meaningful, you need enchantment.”

What’s the difference between enchantment and more traditional methods of persuasion? Simple: rather than feeling like they’ve been manipulated to do what you want them to,  enchanted people feel the same level of devotion to the cause that you do.  In other words, enchantment is how you get others to see your vision, to share it and help you bring it to fruition.

From making your preparations to launching your cause, from crafting a Facebook status update or a post on Twitter, Guy walks you through the process of using both push and pull technologies to create an atmosphere of enchantment that’s hard to resist.

Let me issue this caveat, though: the ideas Guy shares are all common sense, “I knew that” kind of insights.  But please don’t let the fact that the ideas have been around awhile fool you into thinking that they’re common practice.  This book will take you from familiar theories and ideas to practical steps for implementation.  Put these ideas into practice, and watch your tribe grow.

I’m really hoping that you’ll look past the fact that I’m not the world’s greatest book reviewer and give “Enchantment” a shot.  I really believe that the key to success as an entrepreneur or small business person, or even a sales person or blogger, for that matter, is the ability to rally others to your cause, whatever that cause might be.  ”Enchantment” can help you improve your ability to do just that.

But don’t take my word for it: go. Get yourself a copy.  Once you’ve read it, come back here and let me know what you think.

The world needs more enchanters right now; shouldn’t you be one of them?

The days are blurring together. Literally. I sometimes forget whether it’s Monday and I should be writing a proposal for a new computer network, or Saturday and I’m supposed to be recording a podcast and setting up someone’s blog, or Thursday and I should be at a networking mixer, or Tuesday and I should be on a conference call about an upcoming Intel Hybrid Cloud event.

Sometimes, I just want to stop.  It would feel really good, I think, to take a week off, sit in a chair on the beach, and catch up on some reading.  But then I remember: I love what I do, and I love my life.  I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

My friends and family (especially my family) keep telling me that I need to slow down.  I love the fact that they’re concerned about me; I really do.  The funny thing is that they come across like they think my life sucks.  I promise you though: it doesn’t.  I’m tired, I don’t really have much of a social life (unless you count the networking, which pretty much rocks if you live in Sacramento), I have two day jobs and a part-time business, and I’m happier than I’ve ever been.

Johnny B. Truant is right: suck is relative.  If you love what you do, even the shitty days are amazing.

OK: let me start by saying that my decision to wait until Wednesday morning (the morning I left for CES 2011 in Las Vegas) to book my hotel room for CES was probably, in hindsight, a huge mistake.

Rooms on the Strip that would normally go for $60-$70 a night were suddenly in the $300-$400 range.  Unreal.  So I ended up staying at the Siena Suites in Henderson.  It was a nice enough place, kind of an extended stay type of hotel with a kitchen, living room and bedroom.  It was clean, quiet, and the bed was reasonably comfortable; everything I look for in a hotel.

Except for the toilet paper.  I’m not sure what S & M torture shop the management bought it in, but I’d have to guess that it was one that leaned a little more heavily toward the S.  Stiff and rough, while great qualities in a scotch on the rocks, are not what you want in toilet paper.  At least, they’re not what I want.

A quick review of the prices on ToiletPaperWorld.com (no, I didn’t make that up…click the link if you don’t believe me) shows that prices range from about $.50 per roll on the low end to a high of about $1.25 for the premium grade stuff.

During my 4-day stay, I used less than a roll, but let’s say I was a heavy user and managed, somehow, to use a whole roll.  The difference in price between the low-grade stuff they supplied and the premium quality I’m used to would have averaged out to around $0.19 per day.

Here’s my question: was it worth the $0.19 to the hotel to guarantee that, while I was willing to put up with it this time, I’d never come back to their hotel again?  Sure, I could have gone to the corner market and bought my own toilet paper; as it turned out, I could never remember until it was too late.  So I had to grin and bear it.

And there’s the lesson: while cutting costs certainly has a place in your business, cutting corners doesn’t.  It’s one of the most effective ways to disappoint your customers, and those you disappoint are usually only to happy to tell all their friends (or readers) about the experience.  Is that what you really want?

So before you decide that saving $0.19 on supplies is a good idea, ask yourself: is this one of those corners that, if I cut it, could cost me a customer?  If it is, spend the extra money and watch the your customers keep coming back for more.

And if you ever find yourself staying at the Siena Suites in Henderson, be sure to BYOTP.

“If we’re going to take this walk together, we need to start by facing the same direction.” –Pindar,
The Go-Giver by Bob Burg and John David Mann

As I was reading Chapter 2 in “The Go-Giver“, reviewing the material for one of my Mastermind Groups, I thought “Hey, you didn’t make sure everyone is facing the same direction!” Here’s why it’s important.

Imagine you and and I are standing at a cross-roads. I’m facing North and you’re facing West. I tell you we’re going to take a six month journey and say “Let’s go”. Do you think, after taking the road in front of us for that amount of time, we’d end up in the same location? Nope, not a chance.

We need the same map to arrive at the same destination. Simply put, the book is the map, the directions are each of the “Five Stratospheric Laws”, but they require a secret key to unlock their power.

That secret is “Giving”.

What does “giving” mean to you? Let me know in the comments below.

For weeks now, all I’ve been hearing is people talking about how they can’t wait for 2010 to be over and a brand new year to begin.  In fact, I joined in that chorus a time or two.  No doubt, 2010 was a rough year.

But it’s over now.

We’re officially three days in to 2011, and from the looks of things, it has the potential to be a truly amazing year.  Personally, I’m excited to be kicking things off in style with the International Consumer Electronics Show this week in Las Vegas, NV.  This will be my first CES, and I can’t wait to get there.

It also rocks because I’ll be making the trip to Vegas with my friend and fellow blogger, Ryan Snethen.  Ryan is a very cool cat who knows his music and movies, and the more obscure, the better.  His “Did You Miss It?” blog is chock-full of movies you might have missed.  He’s also a writer and an entrepreneur.  We’re making the 10-hour trip by car, so we’ll have lots of time to brainstorm new ideas.  Can’t wait!

Which brings up the topic of road trips.  A couple of recent road trips reminded me of two things: a) I love taking road trips and b) I don’t take enough of them.  I’m changing that this year; more road trips are a must.

Johnny B. Truant also got me thinking today, which is a bad habit of his.  He wrote a post called “Resolutions Suck. Try Anarchy.” that got me thinking all about WHY I want to do the things I want to do, and whether they’re really worthy goals, and whether I’m up to the challenge of seeing them through.  Great stuff.  If you’re not reading Johnny’s blog, start now…even if the posts are a little longish.

2011 has the potential to be a kick-ass year, no doubt about it.  But we can’t assume that it’s going to magically turn out that way just because the calendar rolled over and 2010 is finished.

You’re going to have to put forth some effort if you want to see those results; in fact, truth be told you should have been putting out that effort for awhile now.  But don’t despair if you haven’t already started: just get your ass in gear and figure out what you want to do and, more importantly, WHY you want to do it.  Then (and here’s the really tricky part) go do it! Don’t wait for someone to give you permission or for the circumstances to be just right; they won’t.  Not ever.

Remember one thing: the only moment you really own is this one, right now.  If you let it slip by, it belongs to the past, not you.  And the ones coming up? Those belong to the future, not you.  You get this one.  Use it wisely.

So tell me: what are YOU going to do in 2011 to make it your best year ever?  Share your vision in the comments, and thanks for reading!